"I've Already Got One"

Sometimes when I call someone, give them the build up, and ask them if they currently have a website up they come back with what they think is the endgame to my questions: the old "I've already got a website" line.

This inevitably invites me to parry with: "Oh yeah? Are you happy with it? Is it doing everything you want it to?" The standard return is with the thrust that "it is." At this point you should all know that I saw this coming from a long way back. The whole scenario is one I've run through many times before.

What gets me is the way these guys cling to their defense. You poor, poor fools. You think because you went to law school you've now outwitted me with this very simple ploy? C'mon pal, I wasn't born yesterday.

"Oh yeah?" I reply. "Look, that's great, and I don't want to sell you anything you've already got, but I'd love to see what my competition is up to, what's your web address?"

Two things happen at this point. Either 1) the guy goes ahead and tells me his URL (because he actually has a website up) or 2) the guy gets huffy and defensive and doesn't tell me his URL (because likely he has no website to begin with).

Final result? I've caught you in a lie. If you have a website you would just tell me the address. There's no reason not to. That's why you have the thing up in the first place, isn't it? Besides, I can always just Google you and find it that way. You've just lied to a stranger over the phone rather than leveling with me like a respectable man and saying that you don't want what I have to offer. Lies beget lies, I suppose. A great moral tale in all of this ...